“The ‘Boxer’…” by claudiogennari
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In the long list of zany, un-holiday holidays, this one may rank right up there with the best of them. March 3rd has been designated the day for the masses to ponder, “What if cats and dogs had opposable thumbs?”
Aside from creating the various scenarios that would occur if such a thing were true, we are also asked to take stock and give thanks that they do not have thumbs. Sure it would be great if our cat or dog used this ability to grip a mop or a vacuum, but chances are we are much more likely to see Fido kick back the recliner, open a bag of treats, grab the remote and watch Animal Planet all day.
Honestly, the cats and dogs of this world get into enough trouble as it is and the addition of opposable thumbs seems likely to only increase the amount they would create.
They would be able to open doors to the rooms we keep them out of, or even the front door to leave the house and use that new digit to hitchhike to the park and hang out with those “bad” dogs and cats. Maybe they would learn to hide those car keys when they know a visit to the vet is coming or lock you out of the house if they hear the bath running.
Created by Thomas and Ruth Roy, under the name Wellcat Holidays & Herbs, “What if cats and dogs had opposable thumbs?” Day certainly creates some very funny visuals, but it also reminds us how glad we are that they don’t. –Brendan Quealy
Illinois State Senator Bill Brady, who after winning the Republican primary on February 2nd is likely to become the GOP’s gubernatorial nominee, introduced a bill to legalize mass euthanasia of animals in Illinois. The practice has been banned for only eight months. Most states either outlaw gassing completely or have strict regulations on the use of gas chambers.
The questions that the bill’s introduction raises lead to one place and one place only: money. A veterinarian in Brady’s district who used the gas chamber frequently asked the Senator to get the ban lifted. Why Brady felt compelled to listen to one person instead of taking a quick poll of his constituents is beyond comprehension. His actions put him up against groups with very loud voices, such as the ASPCA and the Humane Society, which has more than 400,000 members in Illinois.
Governor Quinn, an avid dog lover, was quick to take advantage of Brady’s giant misstep. And Jordan Matyas, the Illinois state director for the Humane Society, was even quicker to rip the Senator’s actions.
“Under (Brady’s) legislation, you could have 10 dogs in one box, gasping for air, at the same time fighting, at the same time fearing for their lives,” Matyas told the Chicago Sun-Times. “Even if the animals are separated, you still have to run the gas chamber 20 to 40 minutes, which takes a lot more time than an injection.”
I am sure that most of you are shocked to hear that Illinois banned the mass euthanasia of stray animals by way of the gas chamber less than a year ago. Not shocked that the ban was passed, but that Illinois went nearly a decade into the 21st century before halting such a barbaric practice.
Of course, suggesting that the legislation be reversed will not garner much support—especially for a politician whose reasons are purely monetary. If nothing else, Brady would have been wise to consider his gubernatorial aspirations before introducing the bill.
The suggestion becomes even more ludicrous when you consider that, according to the American Veterinary Medical Association, 54 percent of the households in Illinois have a pet, which amounts to about 6.5 million people—3 million more people than the number who voted in the last election for Illinois governor.
Some say that Brady was quick to take the legislation out of commission, but not quick enough. He has received a great deal of flak, and the criticisms continue to pour in as the fallout from this has yet to go away.
Thankfully, the chances of this subject being broached again with any serious backing behind it are slim to none. –Brendan Quealy
We’ve heard it all, from my dog ate my homework to my dog buried the car keys in the back yard. But, my pig ate my cell phone?! You betcha.
Here’s the crazy and true story, as told by the manager of a Monet, Missouri Verizon Wireless store who heard it from a farmer…
The farmer sauntered into to the store with a rather interesting story:
“I know where my phone is, but I cannot retrieve it. While feeding my pigs, one of them nudged my phone and knocked it out of my holster. Before I could retrieve it, one of the other Pigs picked it up and swallowed it. I confirmed this after calling it (it was on vibrate) and my pig went crazy and broke through a fence. I called it one more time to prove to my wife what actually happened. Well, the pig broke through a wall in the barn, so I stopped calling.”
The farmer wanted to know if insurance would cover that. And as we say at Tails, all’s well that ends well: the pig is perfectly fine, and the farmer got his phone replaced. Lesson learned.
To prevent a pet-tastrophe like this from happening to you be sure to purchase a tough cover to provide the best protection and of course insurance is a must.
As told by: Cheryl Bini Armbrecht
Since 1996 Leaping Bunny has been the authority on cruelty-free goods. They aim to make shopping for products that do not test on animals simple and straightforward. In response to brands designing their own bunny logos to trick consumers, Leaping Bunny formed the Coalition for Consumer Information on Cosmetics (CCIC) along with eight animal protection groups.
The Leaping Bunny stamp of approval is the only way to know if a product doesn’t test a single ingredient on animals in any phase of product development and has pledged not to do so in the future. Leaping Bunny warns that some products state they do not test on animals, when in fact they simply contract other companies to do the testing.
At http://www.LeapingBunny.org consumers can take a pledge to go cruelty-free as well as download a shopping guide detailing all Leaping Bunny approved products. Such brands include The Body Shop, Burt’s Bees, L’Occitane, Mary Kay and Paul Mitchell.